Good day
I trust you're doing well.
As we look to conclude this series, a good place to end off (as well as a good place to begin given that we've just entered a new year), is by taking a look at the quality of our relationship with God.
Jesus said in John 15:1-8 that when we abide in Him we will bear fruit. For the sake of this series, we can refer to "bearing fruit" as "shining our light". This includes everything from loving others, serving faithfully, being obedient to the Holy Spirit, displaying the fruit and gifts of the Spirit and basically everything that God desires and expects of us as His children. Here are a few passages that refer to some of these good deeds/works/fruits: (Luke 6:27-37, Matthew 18:21-35, Romans 12:1-21, 1 Corinthians 13:1-13, Galatians 5:13-26, Ephesians 5:8-33, Colossians 3:1-17, 2 Timothy 2:20-26, 1 Peter 4:1-19, 1 John 4:7-21, Matthew 5:21-42, Matthew 25:31-46, Matthew 28:18-20)
John 15:1-8
“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful. You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.
Abide means to stay connected, remain, dwell, continue in Him - to be in relationship with Him. From the above passage we find that the focus is not so much on the "do's and don'ts", it's not on "avoiding the wrong things" or "five successful steps" to achieving this or that (not that these don't work) but rather, Jesus uses the simple illustration of how a branch bears fruit by simply resting and remaining connected to the vine. The branch doesn't produce anything in it's own ability, it's completely dependent on the vine to produce the fruit. Meaning that as long as we (as the branch), stay in relationship, connected, remain, dwell, continue in Him (the vine) - we will bear fruit (shine our light)
So the question is, what does the quality of my abiding look like, or what does the quality of my relationship with God look like?
I did a quick search on Google looking at some of the top qualities required to maintain a healthy relationship or marriage and listed some of these below (in no specific order), along with additional explanations below taken from some of the articles I read:
Mutual Respect
Forgiveness
Compromise
Kindness
Laughter
Affection
Faithfulness
Validation
Clear communication - (It's worth remembering that communicating doesn’t just mean being able to make your own point well, but learning to listen to what your partner’s saying too. Try to employ ‘active listening’ when you’re talking together. Don’t just wait for your turn to speak, but really listen to what they’re saying. Repeat what they’re saying back to them. And ask them to clarify things – don’t always assume you know what they mean immediately. It’s an obvious one, but bears repeating: communication is one of the most important skills in any relationship. Being able to clearly and consistently state how you’re feeling will mean that those little niggles that might otherwise develop into something worse can be resolved early on)
Honesty, transparency and vulnerability - (Both people must be open and honest about their feelings and things going on in their lives. There is no room for secrecy, as it can lead to feelings of distrust. In a quality relationship, you feel comfortable talking to your mate about almost anything)
Trust - (If you are doubtful of your mate's intentions towards you or love for you, the relationship won't prosper. You should believe what your partner tells you and trust that they always act in the best interest of the relationship and you)
Compassion - (Both partners should be compassionate about the feelings and needs of each other. You are there for each other in good and challenging times. Both people strive to work together to create reliable solutions for problems they may face individually or as a couple. If you lack compassion for each other, you will also lack empathy for the relationship)
Appreciation - (Your relationship should overflow with gratefulness because you appreciate each other so much. Both people in a relationship should initiate small acts of kindness to show that they appreciate their mate. It makes the person feel valued and worthy of being in the relationship)
Commitment - (A quality relationship requires commitment from both parties. The commitment is to each other, as well as the relationship. It is your commitment to give of yourself and ensure that you always put the best interest of your mate and the relationship at the forefront of any decision)
If we look at the above qualities/characteristics of a healthy relationship, can we identify with any of these when it comes to our interaction or engagement with God?
Do we approach our relationship with Him the same way?
Is it built on trust, commitment, compromise, appreciation, clear communication, etc.?
Can we say that we have a healthy relationship with God?
As much as we have our spiritual disciplines that we follow/adhere to, it's important for us to assess the quality of what our personal relationship with God looks like. God can see straight through us. He knows us better than we know ourselves and better than anybody else so there's no point in pretending or being fake about our relationship with Him. He is God, and the most incredible part is that He desires to have a relationship with us, as His children, and the encouragement today is for us to assess how well we actually relate to Him.
We often encourage others to make a commitment to attending church, read the Bible, pray, etc. and all of these are important and things we should be doing because they should not be seen as mere activities or something we do to tick off a box to say that we've done our "duty" - but there comes a time where we just need to put all the Christian jargon aside, forget about saying all the right things and remove the pressure of being concerned about what others might think or say and just be real before God, out of sincerity and genuine conversation, being honest before Him and not just waffling off a few words out of memory or just rushing through our confessions for the day or even praying or reading just for the sake of it or out of habit. This is not a religious practice - this is a relationship and relationships are built on honesty, transparency, vulnerability and communication out of which come appreciation, trust, commitment and confidence (faith) - and God is wanting to have a genuine RELATIONSHIP with all of us!
So my encouragement is that the next time we come before God, that we speak from the heart, having an open and honest conversation with Him; maybe about where we're at with Him, about some things we may be going through or battling with, about our family, our spouse, our work situation, whatever it may be ... not setting aside the activities we know we ought to do, but more so, just being honest with Him and focusing on developing/growing that personal RELATIONSHIP with Him.
God is waiting to hear from you my friend.
Amen